Dear Closest Friends,

When I get all bitchy and moody and sulky with you over the stupidest or smallest or most insignificant of things, it’s not actually you or the silly things that have pissed me off. I just take all my strops and moodiness out on you because I am not afraid of losing you, or hurting your feelings, because I have enough faith in our friendship to know that you can take my shitty moods, wheras if I take it out on the people who have actually annoyed/angered/upset me, everything will kick off and I really don’t want to exacerbate things with those people because it will make life too complicated/difficult. So I apologise in advance for when I do this, I know it’s not ideal, but please try to understand it’s not personal, and that actually the reason I do it to you is because you mean more to me than anyone else, bizarre as it sounds.

Okay, thanks. Sorry.

1) Really thinking you have a shot at something, and it not working out.

2) Having to tell people that it didn’t work out.

3) Having to move away from someone that you don’t ever want to not be around.

4) Having to move out of a place where you’ve been at your happiest.

5) Not knowing when you’ll see your best friend again.

6) Figuring things out that you didn’t want to.

7) Not knowing which direction to take with the things in your head.

8) Watching a film remotely related to love and still crying at every freaking opportunity.

9) Receiving lots of bad news all at once.

10) Not being able to think of a decent number ten so that your ‘things that suck’ list is even.

never have I felt more vulnerable!